Singed ... but not burnt

Ok ... in the last post, among many ramblings, was some frustration and upset over how my annual 'review' thingie seemed to have gone and how I felt that my committee didn't feel I was on the right path, that I was in some ways 'unqualified' to be going after my stated topics.

And how I didn't necessarily disagree!

But I was clearly frustrated, panicked, bewildered, hurt, annoyed .... . Anyway, I waited a few hours... I think ... and then sent a polite, gently inquiring message to Advocate asking for a 'check-in' on how she thought things went.



Well .... I feel slightly better now... at least because Advocate is in my corner and not overly concerned.

Yes, the committee did have some concerns, particularly regarding the education and potential school library focus of my research and that my background didn't quite support this, or give me the grounding and/or experience necessary to teach in this area when I was done. Hello??!!! This is not news ! I believe I've said the same damn things myself!

Hmmmmmm .... or maybe I've only been saying them to myself... and the incredibly small number of people worldwide who might read this blog. I swear I've voiced this concern to Advocate before! Haven't I?? Damn! The stress of grad school is f---ing up my memory! No really, I know I've talked with Advocate about this, but the rest of the committee, probably not.

Still... no need to rip my already tattered ego to further shreds.

But Advocate provides a needed reality, and confidence, boost. She says not to worry, I'm on a good path, and so I don't worry, because I believe in her and her experience fully.



So I got a little singed and seared in the review ... but contrary to my last thoughts, not burned to a little crisp.





Yet ....